your room smells of hookers.
And success
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
