But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Randomize