You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
