i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
Randomize