What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Randomize
