its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
Randomize
