he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
