i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
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