Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Randomize
