I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
I need to align my fucking chakras
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
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