Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
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