one two three fourrrrnication!
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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