You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Randomize
