Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Randomize
