Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
