i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
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