...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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