Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Randomize
