it wasn't lemon gatorade
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
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