I showed him my bush... on skype.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
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