That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
I think I just sharted jello shots
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
