Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
I am puke
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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