hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
