What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Randomize
