i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Randomize
