She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize
