I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Randomize
