Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
Randomize
