he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
zippers are such a cool invention
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Randomize
