went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Randomize
