even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
