Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize
