If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
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