Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
