How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize
