Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
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