Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
