Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
