Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
