Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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