Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
