I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
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