so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
The beer is more important than you right now.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
True strength comes from lack of pants
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
