She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
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