I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Randomize
