Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
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