Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
