the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
