Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Boobs are out for the taking
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
