Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
It's shark week go big or go home
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize
