then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
Randomize
